The Parody that killed all X movie parodies
by AngelElric05
Summary: This is my parody of the X movie watch out for random craziness, fangirls, and a weird pretty boy named Kamui.
1. Default Chapter

**The parody that killed all X Movie parodies**

Yup you read the title right, this is my version of the x movie. It's filled with random funniness, rabid fangirls, and everything else but the kitchen sink, or maybe I'll put that in there too. Ok time for the disclaimers.

I do not own the X series CLAMP does.

Now on with the funniness.

Chapter one: The Prologue 

Once upon a time there were seven dragons of earth called the seven angels, and the seven dragons of heaven known as the seven seals. All fourteen of them were very good and close friends. They would always get together and play dragon ball z, and talk of which teen heartthrob was the hottest. But one day the angels were playing with bugs and as a joke they put them on the heads of the seals. The seals never liked bugs got very grossed out, and as a way to get back at them the seven seals sent an angry group of human to run the angels out of town.

The seven angels were mad at the seven seals, and same for the seven seals being mad at the seven angels. So they decided they will have a battle to the death and it would also decide the faith of the earth. If the angels won the humans would die. But if the seals won the bugs would die. And with that said and done, all fourteen dragons were reincarnated as the fourteen humans we all know and love in X.

That's the true story behind the dragons in X. Well not really this is just my version of it. If you didn't think this chapter was very funny wait till the next ones, and make sure not to drink any water before you read them. TATA.


	2. Kamui the very pretty boy

Hello once again here's the 2nd chapter in my story. P.S. I don't know X

Chapter Two: Kamui the 'VERY' pretty boy   
One day a young 16-year-old boy named Kamui was playing in a field of flying white feathers, and sakura petals. He's a very merry and gay (AN: happy) boy. And as Kamui played in the field he was singing a song he made up about himself. 

"I'm so pretty, that it scares me. I'm prettier then my girlfriend Kotori, and much more of a stud then her brother Fuuma. See how much my freaky man beauty shines threw the feathers and sakura petals." (AN: he's to full of myself) tra lalalala." Then all of a sudden it went dark. "Ahhhh it's dark, and where did all the feathers and sakura petals go?" Kamui then spotted some in the far distance. "My happy place has moved over there!" The very odd pretty boy runs over to the sakura petals and saw his mother. Kamui's mommy reaches out her hand and grabs a handful of the petals. "No mommy my sakura petals my petals you can't have them."

"Kamui how many times have I told you, you have to share sakura petals?"

"I don't know you've told me so many times I lost count after 500." Kamui's mom slaps her forehead, and releases the petals. "Mommy why is it so dark in the enchanted field all of a sudden?"

"How about I put some light on?" Kamui mom stepped on a gas line, gas started to come out and Touri lit a match, "Ahhhhhhhhh this is hotter then it looks!"

"Mommy!" Kamui yelled as he tried to get closer to his mom, but he realized the flames would burn his beautiful body so he stood back, "Mom what's going on? This is something that would only happen in an evil anime."

"Kamui this is an evil anime, well a dark anime in this case," She reaches into her stomach and pulls out a beautiful sword," Kamui you must go to Tokyo, and save the city with this very sword."

"EWWWWWWW it's all gross and slimy, I'm not touching that!"

"Well to bad!" yelled Touri as she threw the sword at Kamui and it went into his body.

"Hey that sword went into my body and I'm still alive! I can Sidfreed and Roy's new partner! IT'S MAGIC!" Touri rolled her eyes at her son as she read the script to see what happens next.

"Oh this is the part where I blow up and my blood will get all over you and you scream you're head off."

"Ahh what again."

KABOOM, Touri splatters into a million pieces and getting all over Kamui's pretty face.

"MOMMY!" Kamui screamed as it was written in the script, and realized how dirty he was, "Oh no now I have to wash these pants twice!"

LOL that was Numba 2 XD man in this fic Kamui's really dumb! Please RR

Kamui fg (fangirl) 1: HOW DARE YOU MAKE FUN OF MY KAMUI-CHAN?

Kfg 2: You're Kamui-chan!? He's my Kamui-chan!

Kfg 1: No mine!

Kfg 2: Mine!

The two fan girls get into a huge fight, with swords and everything.

Me: --;; rr plz


	3. The return of the pretty boy and introdu...

Konichi wa everyone thank for reviewing on my fic, and as promised chapter 3

Kfg 1: And you better not make my Kamui look bad!

Kfg 2: Who said he was you're?

(They start fighting again)

Me: Here's chapter 3 -.-;

The return of the Pretty boy, and introductions 

We now enter the mind of a young girl by the name of Kotori. She is falling into a giant puddle that lurks in her dreams; she is no ordinary girl that has dreams, her dreams predict the future. Like if her dog get hit, or if a UFO is going to New Mexico. But this dream is different.

"Ah another dream I wonder what I'll dream this time?" she asked herself as she saw a round ball like object bounce past her. "Hey it's a jaw breaker my favorite candy!" Kotori yelled as she ran after it. When she finally caught up to it a man in a long robe picked it up and looked at it. "No my jaw breaker now give it back!" The man then relived that he had a giant set of angel wings, and it was non other then the pretty boy myself Kamui. "Kamui!?" Kotori said shocked," You're not usally in my dreams is it Thursday already?"

Kamui spread out one of his wings and another Kamui who was holding another giant jawbreaker. "What two Kamuis' then it must be Friday. Don't start with out me I don't want sloppy seconds!" screamed the crazy long haired blond as she started to run closer to the boys when angel Kamui tried to take a bite of his jawbreaker, breaking his jaw, and letting the hard candy fall to the ground, and shatter." Why did you do that I could have eaten it?" Seal Kamui gave Kotori his jawbreaker as angel Kamui jumped up and down in pain.

In the present we see a mysterious beautiful black figure jumping around while zillions of sakura petals are falling all over the place and there are no cherry blossom trees in sight. "Who can out run a rabid fangirl? Is faster then Speed racer? And can leap over ToykoTower with a single bound? Why is it non-other then I! The Pretty Boy Kamui!" said Kamui as he did a Sailor Moon/ Ginyuu force pose, on top of a pole of a very very very tall building. (Sakura petals are still poring by the zillions and there are no trees at all in the city. Where are they coming from?????) "Okay now mommy left me a list of the people who I have to find the and the people to stay away from." Kamui looked threw his pants pockets till he finally found the list, "Found it!"

_Dear Kamui,_

_If you are reading this I've already given you the sword, exploded all over you're face as you scream in fright, oh yea and I'm dead. The people you must find are the dragons of heaven. They're names go as the following: Sorata a young Buddhist monk from the mountains. Likes to eat a lot and check out hot girls._

Cut to a scene of Sorata trying to get vision of girls changing in his secrete fire when Kamui's face is seen instead of a beautiful woman. 'Man that is one pretty guy!' Sorata thought to himself.

Yuzariha is a cute 14-year-old girl the youngest of the seals. She is molded after Mick Nekoi of CLAMP. She enjoys ice cream, and has a thing for much more older men.

We see Yuzariha in down town Tokyo with her Inuki having what else ice cream! She then noticed Kamui on the giant T.V. doing weird poses while being swarmed by sakura petals. The young girl is shocked by this and watches Kamui act stupid as her ice cream melts down her hand, and birds perch on her head.

Arashi is an ice bitch from the mountains and is her shrines last guardian, and is not very social and likes to eat from garbage cans.

Arishi is seen getting her dinner out of the dumpster and see's Kamui in the shrine tablets doing dumb poses. "I just lost my appetite."

Subaru is a bishi from CLAMP's Tokyo Babylon he has a lot of angst so don't try to get into an angst fight with him, and he's still hung over his last boyfriend 'yes I said boyfriend'.

Subaru is pulling petals off of a bunch of flowers and saying 'he loves me, he loves me not'. Maybe that's where all the petals are coming from?

Aioki an editor for Asuka Magazine and Karen a club dancer also love Tokyo and wish to protect it. Be forwarded of Satuki the girl loved by computers she is a dragon of earth, and is right now having a love affair with her computer.

Satuki is wearing a domestic's outfit and is holding a whip, "Okay beast you've been a very bad boy. Now tell me the location of Kamui or I wont sit on you for a week."

Kanoe is the leader of the dragons of earth and is the younger sister of Hinoto the leader of the dragons of heaven. Sei-chan Subaru's former bf is also a dragon of earth and he still likes to torture Subaru.

Sei-chan is on the phone with Subaru and asks him out to dinner, "So are you interested Subaru-kun?"

"Yes!" yelled the other very pretty boy on the other end of the line.

"Well... to bad!" hangs up on him," I love being evil."

And they're a couple of other members like Yuuto, the big flirt who has a thing for crazy Satzuki.

"Come on Satzuki give a big one right here." Said Yuuto as he pointed to his cheek. Satzuki just curled up her fist and gave him a big punch in the mouth, "Ow! That hurt!"

There's also an evil clone of some girl and her dad, and the replacement for Kakyo.

The Kakyo replacement and the clone are busy playing Old Maid.

Well that's all I have to tell you Kamui. You be a good boy for mommy okay!

Kamui understood the letter and decided to go look for the dragons of heaven. Kamui feels a weird presence and flies off to find it. He comes across another giant building and on top are the evil date canceller himself Sei-chan. And the pretty boy who's still in love with him.

"I can't believe you stood me up again!" yelled a very angry Subaru.

"Sorry Subaru-kun. But I just love picking on you." Laughed Sei-chan.

"Well I'm not going to wait for Kamui to show up we end it right here and now!" said Subaru as he powered up.

OH BOY CHAP 3 IS DONE RR PLZ


	4. The Romantic Food Fight and Other Junk

KOBAN WA OMG GOMEN NASI FOR TAKING SO LONG FOR AN UPDATE. Well you see I'm a senior in high school things are always busy. ACT's, tests, and projects. --

Well here it is chapter 4 of The Parody that killed all X Movie Parodies. In this chappy Subaru fights Sei-chan. We meet Fuuma and Kotori, and some other crap happens. So sit back and relax.

The Romantic Food Fight and Other Junk 

Kamui perched on a local rooftop to watch the battle between the two former lovers. One a weird yet hot trench coat wearing guy, with sunglasses, (It's night who wears sunglasses at night?). The other is dressed in a white button down dress, and not to mention he looks very UKE right now!

"Well Subaru-kun," started the sunglasses at night weirdo," I'm so glad you could come out tonight and see me."

"Does this white dress make me look fat?" asked the Uke.

"No it's very becoming of you Subaru-kun. You look like a blushing bride," replied the elder bishonen.

"Wow," stuttered the Uke," Thanks Sei-chan I am blushing,"

Kamui was watching, and thinking why are they being do cutie with each other, they were suppose to be killing each other.

"Come on I want to see some blood!" shouted the impassion pretty boy.

"You know Subaru-kun that beautiful mysterious voice is right we should be fighting not flirting," said Sei-chan with a smile.

"What you think he has a more prettier voice then me?" asked the angry Uke.

"Yup," answered Sei-chan," I wanna hear him moan."

Kamui: OO?!

Uke (Subaru) V-V

Sei-chan: (**thinking naught thoughts**) (A/N: When is he not?)

"I've had enough of you!" yelled the pissed off Uke," We finish it right here and now!" Then the Uke put up a barrier shield that looked like Strawberry Shortcake.

"So I take it, you never stop watching this childish 1980's cartoon huh Subaru-kun?"

"Shut up!" yelled the Uke who has somehow changed into a Strawberry Shortcake shirt and pink pants.

"You are so gay,..." said Sei-chan.

"I'll show you who's gay!" yelled the very obvious gay boy. He starts to power up and his body starts to make a boiling noise, and for some odd reason it smells like noodles.

"Interesting..." sighed Sei-chan. Kamui watched with intensity, he had never seen anything so DAMN gay!

"I don't want to be left alone in a room with one of these two." The pretty boy thought to himself.

"Get ready Sei-chan this is my new attack!" yelled the Uke who smelled of chicken noodles.

"What did you say something?" asked Sei-chan as he put away his Inu Yasha manga.

"Man you really make me mad. First you killed my twin sister, betrayed me, stand me several times for our dates, and you...RIPPED UP MY STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE COLLECT!"

"Your point is?" asked Sei-chan.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh. This attack is for all those times you stood me up! SUPER RAMEN I STILL THINK YOU'RE A HOT SEXY JERK, EVEN THOUGH I REALLY HATE YOU CHAIN!" the Uke swung a giant noodle at Sei-chan who only caught it with his teeth, and sucked the noodle into this mouth and ate it.

"Nice Subaru-kun, but I have a better attack," Sei-chan takes out the dinner menu and reads it," Ah, here's a good one."

He takes out a coupon for 10 off of turkey legs, and uses his crazy powers to do something well...crazy.

"Weird flying drumsticks!" said the elder man, as he used his coupon to summon the bizarre turkey legs and they were also wearing sunglasses, (A/N: sunglasses . ) "attack the Uke!" The legs went flying toward Subaru, and the dumbass was to stun to fight back or he could have been more worried about his Strawberry Shortcake shirt getting ripped up, so he ran around like a scarred little baby.

"Ahhhhhh! Save me!" screamed the scared Uke. (A/N: I bet he's gone his pants already ) Kamui sat and watched and ate his popcorn in silence, thinking that the Uke deserves to die. After running around so much a turkey leg flew into Subaru's mouth, and started to choke him. "ACK! GAK! UKE!" gagged the poor choking boy. Turning blue in the face Subaru finally killed over. Sei-chan could only laugh, as he held his Inu Yasha manga.

"Sorry Subaru-kun, but it had to be done," as he laughed a turkey legs also flew into Sei-chan's mouth, chocking him, and he as well dropped dead. The Strawberry Shortcake barrier came down, and left a smell of strawberry Kiel (it's a kind of alcohol)

Kamui flew over to see the remains of the battle, "Wow! They both ended up chocking to death on turkey, so tragic. YES I GET THE LEFT OVERS!" Kamui bent down to gather the turkey pieces when he heard a voice call for him.

"Kamui, this battle was only the tip of the ice berg, and remember to clean up all of your sakura petals when you leave Tokyo again, and to read Tsubasa," said the voice, who was really the guy that was used to replace Kakyou in the movie.

"Why should I read Tsubasa?" asked Kamui.

"Cause I show up in it. It's the only time CLAMP has ever put me in a manga!" answered the angry replacement.

"Sure I'll look into it," replied Kamui. As for Subaru-kun (Uke) and Sei-chan they've arrived in the after life, and are greeted by Hokuto and Kakyou.

"Hey little brother it's so good to see you again. It's sucks that you died," said Hokuto with a smile.

"Always good to see you to Onaasan. Oh who's the guy with you?" asked Subaru.

"This is my koibito Kakyou-kun. Kakyou-kun this is my younger twin brother Subaru-kun, and our friend, his lover and the guy who killed me, Sei-chan," said Hokuto.

"Well now two sexy Ukes," said Sei-chan with a smirk,"lookes like I'm in trouble."

Subaru: OO

Hokuto: . 

Kakyou: o.O

Sei-chan:

We cut back to Tokyo at the Togokoshi Shrine where we see the young blond headed girl come out from her house. She seems to be very happy with the dream she just, and we're not going to ask why.

"Oniichan!" cried the girl," guess what?"

"What?" asked her brother, who was facing the other way looking up at the stars.

"I had a dream about Kamui just now!" said Kotori.

"KAMUI!?" shouted her older brother as he turned around all of a sudden with a gust of wind, and cherry petals swirled around him, and harp music started to play in the background.

Fuuma fangirl 1: Oh Fuuma is so hot

Fuuma fangirl 2: Yes he is.

Both: (sigh)

"Yes Kamui," replied Kotori," he's our old childhood friend. I sure do miss him. I dreamed he was grow up and good looking."

"Did he still act like a weird?" asked Fuuma.

"Well...yeah kinda." Said Kotori.

"I remember the day Kamui and his mother left Tokyo 6 years ago," started Fuuma.

"Yes, mother was very upset to see Kamui's mom leave. I wonder why she took it the hardest?" asked Kotori.

"Who knows? I remember the day Kamui and his mom were chased out of town because Kamui was getting sakura petals all over town and causing people to drown in them," stated Fuuma.

"I remember the days when we used to play together, it was so much fun," sighed Kotori.

Fuuma and Kotori watch an illusion of themselves and Kamui playing "the end of the earth".

"Okay Fuuma, you have to tie Kotori to that metal poll, and you have to stab her and chop her head off while I scream like a crazy person, then we have to battle to the death," said child Kamui.

"Okay," replied child Fuuma.

"I don't like this game!" cried child Kotori.

"Gosh our kids are just so cute, aren't they?" said Touri as she and Fuuma and Kotori's mom watched the kids play.

"Yes, but not as cute as you," said Fuuma and Kotori's mother as she started to make out with Touri. (1)

"Ah so many memories," sighed Fuuma.

"Yeah," agreed Kotori.

The ground starts to shack and giant noodles come out from the ground.

"Ahhhh Oniichan it's the attack of the killer food!" cried Kotori.

"What! But I thought that one weird gay guy was dead?" shouted Fumma.

"What gay guy?" asked Kotori.

"I have no idea how I knew that..." said Fuuma.

We cut to Dragon of Earth HQ and see Satsuki sitting on the beast in her dominatrix outfit controlling the beast.

"What a fool. First of all, yes Subaru is dead, second of all these are not chicken noodles these are meat noodles, and third of all. How does he know about Subaru?"

"Oniichan help!" yelled Kotori.

"Hang on I'm coming!" cried Fuuma, but before he could get there a giant gust of wind blew and sakura petals filled the air, and a black figure jumped out of no where and grabbed Kotori and blew up the noodles with a single blast. Who is this, and why does he have special powers and sakura petals? And why does Fuuma know about Subaru? Can Sie-chan have two ukes? Find out in chapter 5!

OH boy chapter 4 is finally done and to sum up a few things about Fuuma's mom and Kamui's mom. (1)

Fuuma's mom is a lesbo and she is in love with Kamui's mom. In the series she takes Kamui's mom's place to bear the first sword, all because of her love for her.

Fuuma and Kamui Yaoi fangirl 1: Wow how sweet! No wonder why Fuuma and kamui have such a special bond. (cries)

FaKYFG 2: Yea...(reads a X doujinshi about Fuuma and Kamui)

FaKYFG 1: Hey let me see!

FaKYFG 2: No!

They start to fight

Me: rr plz -.-


	5. The fight for the Pretty Boy and the kid...

Hey People! OHMY GOSH I AM SOOOOOOOO SORRY FOR TAKING FOREVER! Well here's what's been going on! I've been trying to get my driver's permit, I've been looking for scholarships and I've applied to a college, but they've still not responded. ; So I figure I work on my stories again! YEAAAAAAAAA Well last time we left off Kamui has been reunited with Fuuma and Kotori, oh and Subaru and Sei-chan are dead. (cries) and in this chapter people are going to be fighting over Kamui, and Kotori is kidnapped O.O

Disclaimer! I NO OWN X

CHAPTER 5 THE FIGHT OVER THE PRETTY BOY AND THE KIDNAPPING FO THE LITTLE BIRD.

"Kamui…You've really returned?" said Fuuma.

"Yes I have," replied Kamui.

"Kamui…" blushed Kotori.

"Oh wait I should do my introduction!" shouted Kamui.

"Huh?" said both Fuuma and Kotori.

Kamui throws Kotori into the air and he starts his weird posses, and odd speeches. "Who is the prettiest CLAMP boy ever drawn? Who can out run a rabid fangirl and leap over Tokyo Tower with a single bond?" (strikes a sailor moon pose)

Fuuma: (sweatdrops)

Kotori: KAMUI!

"That's right. I Kamui am that boy. And now to catch Kotori, and do another Sailor Moon pose with her in my arms." As Kamui held out his arms to catch the little bird, Kotori just happen to land in a tree about 10YARDS away from Kamui.

Kotori: Owww .

Kamui: O.o Sorry!

"Hey Kamui staring contest!" shouted Fuuma.

"Okay," replied Kamui, and the contest began, and all of a sudden, they both got headaches," I need Advil!" (AN: and so do I) Then the sakura petals started sworming in again out of no where, and Kamui realized he was now floating above the stars, and behind him was a crystal earth, with a little person inside of it," What is that?" Kamui asked himself.

"Kamui please you must help us!" cried the person inside the glass earth.

"Hey awesome it's a jawbreaker!" Kamui grabbed the earth and was getting ready to put it in his mouth when, the little person inside shouted "STOOOOOOPP!"

"Huh? Who are you," asked the confused boy.

"My name is Hinoto! And I am the leader of the Dragons of Heaven," has a tear drop go down her face," Kamui please you must help us. You are the chosen one to lead us into battle with the Dragons of Earth," cried the little prophet.

"What? Oh great another one! Listen I told my mom, the press, and CLAMP I don't want to save the world!" shouted the angry pretty boy.

"Okay then Kamui I shall show you what will become of the earth if you don't help us!" said Hinoto as she put a vision into Kamui's head.

"What is this trash dump?" asked Kamui.

"This so called trash dump is Tokyo. Well it will be Tokyo if you don't help me and the other members of the Dragons of Heaven."

"But why should I care! I mean the earth will end with or without my help, so why should I care so much?"

"Because Kamui if you don't help us all there will be no more sakura petals, and happy fields, and peaceful meadows with feather for you to frolic in, to sing and dance!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Kamui's screams were so loud it shattered the glass earth, and the vision sending Hinoto back to the diet building where the other members of the Dragons of Heaven are waiting for her to come back.

"Princess Hinoto!" shouted Karen, Yuzariha, Aoki, Sorata, and Arashi.

"I'm okay," said Hinoto, "kamui's screams of terror just sent me flying back here."

"so is that guy really Kamui?" Yuzariha, as she stuck pocky sticks up her nose, "how much older then me is he?"

"He's about two years older then you," replied Sorata.

"Oh not my type then! Aoki!"

"No I have a wife and daughter, I've told you that since the day we met!"

"Oh darn it!"

"So that boy is really Kamui?" asked Arashi.

"Yes he is, and you need a bath!" shouted Hinoto.

"Oh cram it! Everyone is always getting after me, and how I smell. I smell like a basket of roses!"

"Yea, OLD ROSES!" shouted Karen.

"SHUT UP YOU SLUT!"

"Hey what about Subaru!" shouted the pocky child," He's older then me and single!"

"Oh I forgot to mention Subaru is dead," said Hinoto.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Yuzariha.

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Back at the shrine Kotori and Fuuma, are wondering why Kamui is in the fetal position and crying about no more sakura petals, fields and meadows.

"Kamui-chan?"

"Kamui-kun"

"No more flowers, and feathers, and happiness all gone, but I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT!"

"Huh a fight? Why would Kamui be fighting?" asked Kotori.

"Oh it's that fight to decide the fate of the earth, duh sis," explained Fuuma.

"Huh? How do you know all this stuff?" asked Kotori.

"I don't know! So leave me alone about if or I'll put you on a metal cross and stab you in the heart, and chock you into little pieces!" screamed Fuuma.

Kotori started crying as it started to rain, "Hey it's raining?"

"Rain yes let's play in the rain!" shouted Kamui as he started jumping up and down but got cut on the rain," Ow that hurt! ACK I'M BLEEDING CALL THE AMBULANCE!"

"Let's just get inside!" said Fuuma, and everyone started to run towards the house but then the rain stoped.

"Oh no the rain stopped! I don't wanna die I don't wanna die. I'm dying I'm melting melting melting!" screamed Kamui.

"No you're not melting you dumb baka!" said a voice.

"Who's there?" asked Fuuma.

"Why it is I the replacement!" and the Kakyou replacement, "and this is the clone!"

"DADDY!" shouted the clone as he/she jumped down to hug Fuuma.

Fuuma: WTF?

Clonie: But daddy it's me!

Replacement: BAKA HE'S OUR DADDY IN THE SERIES NOT THE MOVIE!

Clonie: Oh never mind then (jumps back on the roof)

"We came here to get Kamui! Now hand him over or we will be forced to use our powers against you!"

(Somewhere up in the realm of the dead)

Sei-chan: Haha the replacement said 'came'. (AN: use your imaginations)

"What kind of powers do you have?" asked Kotori.

"I use this pretty cloth," said Clonie.

"And I have a water gun of DEATH!" (squirts it)

Fuuma, Kamui, and Kotori sweat drop.

"Ha some powers!" said a voice in the background.

"Who's there?" asked replacement.

"Why it is us the Dragons of Heaven and we came here to get Kamui!" said Sorata.

"Great more people who want me!" pouted Kamui.

The replacement and Clonie jump off the roof, and grab Kamui's arm, "No he's ours and you can't have him! NAHHH (does the Japanese way of flipping the bird) (AN: The way you flip someone off is Japan is you hold down the bottom of your eye and stick out your tongue)

"No he's ours!" shouted the Dragons of Heaven, and they grabbed Kamui's other arm. The two different sides started pulling and tugging on Kamui and Kotori and Fuuma just watched on the sidelines in amazment.

"Oniichan why are they fighting over Kamui-chan?"

"Because they both want him for there side for the big battle to end the earth, but kamui has another self an evil side. Who doesn't like flowers or happy things, and when Kamui decides which side he wants to be on, the other Kamui will come out and take the other side, and the battle will begin!" explained Fuuma acting all angst like.

"Wow Oniichan how do you know all this stuff?"

"DON'T MAKE ME GET OUT THE SWORD!"

"Ahhhhh!"

"Wait I forgot to put up the barrier!" shouted Sorata as he let go and put up the barrier, and it was in the shape of a woman that was on truckers mud flaps.

"Just like with sex you must always have a barrier of protection right Arashi?" said Sorata, and Arashi just sweat dropped. Both sides go back to fighting, and little did they know but the evil, and half dressed, and half baked Kanoe was planning on stealing Kotori, and taking her back to the lire of the Dragons of the Earth.

"Come to me pretty girl." Said Kanoe, as she reached up her hands from a hole in the ground to grab Kotori.

"Ah help I can't scream for help!" said Kotori as she was being drug down the slimy hole.

Sei-chan: Hole Haha (AN: takes a giant fan with Japan's flag on it and slaps Sei-chan)

"Help me!" shouted Kotori.

"Don't worry Kotori I'll save you!" said Fuuma as he jumped down the hole.

By this time the Dragons of Earth have given up on getting Kamui so the retreated with their tales between their legs.

"Yea we won!" shouted Arashi as she lifted up her arms.

"Ahhhhh! Put down your arms they stink!" said Karen.

"Hey where are Kotori and Fuuma?"

"We don't know!" said the Dragons of Heaven.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" shouted Kamui as he franticly started searching for his lost friends, including making jumps over to Kyoto, and the moon, and still no Kotori and Fuuma.

Oh where oh where could they be? You'll have to find out in the next chapter of "The Parody that killed all X movie parodies"


End file.
